kristin has been a bad kristin
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
