do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
He keeps bees of course he's weird
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
