This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
50% drunk capacity currently
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
