i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Randomize
