he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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