hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
