She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
