the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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