I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
