I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
