why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
