matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
