At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
