Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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