I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
