So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
