your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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