I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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