I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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