Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
