the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
