Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
