I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
