Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize