No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
