well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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