I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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