Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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