I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
