I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
