Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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