Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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