Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
