Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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