i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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