you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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