there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
