is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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