How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Randomize
