I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
