That's when you crack a 10am beer
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you didnt know i had herpes?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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