If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
