Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I wish they made helmets for livers.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
