I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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