I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
