Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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