I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
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