they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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