How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Text me some of your sweat
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
