Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
