I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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